THE HOROSCOPE OF BEL-DARIUS JONAS, CHALDEAN MAGI
The Horoscope of Bel-Darius Jonas, Chaldean Magi
For the week of July 22, 2001
by Jon Deer
July 23, 2001
Taurus: There will be hot and humid weather in areas of the U.S. this week.
Gemini: You will add gasoline to your car.
Cancer: Your mother carried you for nine months; you can't talk to her for nine minutes?
Leo: Blind dates begin awkwardly.
Virgo: There is no joy in Mudville.
Libra: Look for newspaper print to rub off on your fingers.
Scorpio: Your phone line will be clear enough to call your Mother.
Sagittarius: Anyone who told you "It can't get any worse" is wrong.
Capricorn: Waldenbooks will carry novels by Stephen King.
Aquarius: Give peace a chance.
Pisces: But you're too busy to call your own Mom, aren't you!
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