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RHYMES AND REASONS
The Singular Truth About Polygamy
Plus: The Halves and the Halve-Nots

by Greg Asimakoupoulos
April 25, 2008

The Singular Truth About Polygamy
Why less is more.

"Not good that man should be alone,"
the Lord was heard to say.
But did He mean "Get all you can?
The FLDS way?"

Down in the Lone Star state you'll find
a lack of lonely men
who yearn for Zion and then wed
not once but one times ten.

Polygamy is most absurd.
One man with many wives?
Wise Solomon was known for that
but died a fool deprived.

"Deprived of what?" you likely ask.
Deprived of what I've known.
The joy of giving all of me
to one and one alone.

Polygamists don't understand
that sex is more than fun.
They never know that special bond
of two becoming one.

They do not know the simple truth
that Eve and Adam knew.
That marriage is complex enough
when it involves just two.
 
 
The Halves and the Halve-Nots
Why splitting hares can drive you bugs.

In soph-o-more biology,
I had to pith a frog.
My friends who went to "doctor" school
were forced to dissect dogs.

For science sake they slice up rats
beneath a microscope.
A sharpened scalpel carving flesh
will give sick people hope.

But bunnies are not halved, are they?.
The thought just leaves me ill.
And yet a rabbit cut in twain
some char upon a grill.

While many halve, far more halve not.
But when push comes to dare,
the halve nots (of which I am one)
are simply splitting hares.


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