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Too Much Money

Sort 258 takes on baseball and the Green Party.

by Dear Jon
March 9, 2004

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ACTUAL LETTER TO DEAR JON:

Dear Jon,

Recently baseball player Alex Rodriguez was in the headlines again, because of his $25 million a year paycheck. Is it possible for a person to make too much money?

Fiscally Strapped
 
Dear Fisc,
 
It is possible for a person to make too much money. It is not possible for Dear Jon to make too much money.
 
Here is a way to tell when a person is making too much money:
 
Having money, they think they are so privileged that if they accidentally murder their chauffer they can conspire with party guests to make it look like a suicide;
 
Or, they can go duck-hunting with justices of the Supreme Court while a case in which they are interested is pending a hearing;
 
Or, during question and answer periods at employee conventions they can laugh when asked if the share prices on the company are going to drop, and then turn around and Sell! Sell! Sell! those employees out;
 
Or, they can dance outside the court house where they have just been arraigned for molesting children;
 
Or, they can decide not to show up and practice for a team until they are promised even MORE money;
 
Or, they can decide at will to run for political office.
 
If I ever receive 25 million dollars to write Dear Jon Advice Columns, I promise I will never do any of those things. I will use my money the way it is intended: ten percent to religious and charitable organizations, forty percent to the government, and the remaining on conspicuous consumption. Or I might just buy a town in Nebraska and populate it with people who agree with me about everything. Whatever.

 
ACTUAL LETTER TO DEAR JON:

Dear Jon,

With Ralph Nader entering the presidential race, is it possible we could get a fourth or even fifth national candidate?

Sincerely,
Looking for a candidate
 
Dear Candid,
 
This is what will happen thanks to Nader. Liberals who want Bush out of office will abandon the Green Party and vote for the Democrats. Thus the Green Party and its anti-family, anti-economy agenda will be marginalized, hopefully forever, which is a good thing.
 
The Democrats will find tree-huggers and Marxists in their caucuses again, trying to tilt them leftward. This is not such a good thing. The Democrats will thus establish themselves as the Welfare State Party, which is a bad thing. Talk of compassion and community will deceive many of the elderly. In power, Democrats will pass laws that remove the incentives for private citizens to pursue economic empowerment.
 
The Republican Party, under control of the neo-cons in the White House and the national committee, will firmly establish itself as the Warfare State party. This is a terrible thing. Talk of patriotism will deceive many blue-collar gun-owners in the upper Midwest (the “Reagan Democrats.”) In power, Republicans will pass laws that permit federal agents to scrutinize and eavesdrop on the private transactions of citizens.
 
It is obvious that the current platforms of our two major political parties provide no check or balance to big government. The alternatives provided by big government are either that we pursue warfare before welfare, touted by the Texas Oil Zillionaire, or welfare before warfare, touted by the New England Ketchup Zillionaire. Constitutional checks and individual life, liberty, and pursuit of happiness, no longer fit the Big Government agenda.
 
Governments rule by the consent of the governed.  Beginning with Solidarity in Poland in the early 1980’s, the people of the Soviet Bloc no longer consented to the premises on which the Soviet Regime was established. Hopefully, citizens in these United States will also come to a point that we no longer consent to the premises of our Big Government regime. Hopefully, the citizens of the United States will decide to give our constitution a chance to work.  Hopefully, the system of elections as designed will purge us of the Big Government Regime in a peaceful and orderly manner.
 
Compassion and patriotism are necessary to good, responsible citizenship.  However, too many hearts are set on choosing between the Neo-conservative Warfare Agenda out of misplaced patriotism, or the Welfare Entitlements Agenda out of misplaced compassion. Thus, the Big Government Regime will be re-elected in 2004. A fourth or fifth “national candidate” this year will not make a difference to this election.
 
A concentrated effort to oust Big Government through elections will not take place until the mid-term elections of 2014, setting the stage for national debate in 2016. What might postpone this house-cleaning for another twenty years would, itself, be a good thing: the engines of free enterprise might power another surplus federal budget and debt reduction, as happened during the Clinton Administration. It will postpone the house-cleaning because people will learn the wrong lesson, persuading themselves that it was Big Government, rather than free enterprise, that worked.

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